Find Your Way, Part 11… Normalisations

Normalisations 

Our mind based conditioning creates normalisations that we default to, that feel natural, even when they are causing harm to our self, others or the environment. 

During my latest time in Italy, I noticed so many young people smoke or vape, despite the known health risks. These popular ‘new normals’ bring a familiarity that feels more like a comfortable companion.      

When we are unable to ‘see’ the layers behind what is actually happening (to us by others) we more easily fall for and defend these normalisations. 

So many people believe they are choosing the action. They may not see that initially they were coerced at a vulnerable stage, which led to the addiction which they felt could only be satisfied by that addiction. They may not have seen how they were used by others who don’t have your care in mind and who are willing to bring harm, for their own greed and greater financial ‘success’.  

Instead they leave their destiny in the hands of those driving the trends.  

It seems that ‘popular’ has overtaken our what we know improves our health and wellbeing.  

Complying to the ‘popular’ is affecting our ability to move from these normalisations because in many instances they have been shaped and passed down by generations before us, and considered ‘just the way it is’. 

Where we would once use the term ‘common sense’, nowadays it is more about ’normalised sense’. 

In years of past, common sense may have been based on what brought care and wellbeing to people, families and the planet, to prevent harm. Despite cultural differences, this was a common.  

Common sense or normalised sense?

‘Normalised sense’ differs.  

This more normalised sense for humans is based on trends that have become popular. It is behind addictions to porn, drugs, lies, gaming, crimes, buying commodities, chasing money, following new fads. The statistics in Australia and around the world have shown this by the increase of numbers, incidence and prevalence. These everyday ‘now’ commons are no longer in the name of care. 

The new normalised commons, have spiralled due to the patterns brought about by 

Over time, our mind’s development and the way we have come to adapt and see and the perspectives and beliefs we hold, has gradually shifted the nature of these normalised commons.   

For example, we may believe that we don’t have the time or desire to act on things such as recycling, nurturing our environment, bringing compassion to others, engaging healthy lifestyles, giving time to nurture nature.  

Instead we follow and chase, based on what is easiest or to avoid our own pain. It seems we cannot lift ourselves away from these harming patterns, so as to have a more positive impact on our humanity or the planet. The current statistics and trends are informing us of where we are headed. 

So how have these types of behaviours become ‘normal’? Who are we listening to and why? And what keeps these systems, industries and our current patterns going even when there are contradictions that don’t make sense? 

It seems that currently, when we don’t fit into the society and ways that have unfolded, it is commonly suggested that there is something wrong with us. It shapes new courses, education, industries that help people better ‘fit’ into the societies created.We don’t consider that there may be something wrong with the nature of the system that has been created. 

And according to Czech dissident Vaclav Havel, society members in attempting to avoid trouble, have complied and are now complicit to ‘living within a lie’. This was written in his essay called The Power of the Powerless, in 1978.
  
So these types of normalisations have continued to flourish in the systems, approaches, processes and procedures in businesses, governments, organisations, religions, families and industries. 

They are found in the words, attitudes and actions and lifestyle trends such as fashion, exercise, food, hobbies, sport, language used, music, arts, and just the way see, feel and do things in life e.g.

They survive because in some way they meet personal or group perceived needs or fears.   

The speed of change

The rate of change from past centuries was gradual, however by the 1900’s the characteristics of society changed significantly each decade, which was highlighted by descriptions such as the Roaring 20’s, the Dirty Thirties, Fighting the Forties, Fabulous fifties, the Swinging Sixties, the ‘me Decade’ in the seventies, the decade of decadence in the 80’s. 

Since the introduction and advancement in technology and modern science, the rate of change with trends, knowledge, lifestyle, economics, has sped up and in many instances, so fast it is difficult to determine the impact it is having.  

Generations that once changed over many years, are now transforming faster with ‘micro generations’ lessening the age gaps. 

The rapid nature of changing technology available, is creating greater gaps. While some people are still living until over 100, there is great disparity between them and those born in this technology era. It’s like living and communicating with a 1.0 version with others who are on a 4.0 version. 

What’s more, we are now sold ‘unlimited data’, that is speeding things up even more. We are seeing many things change before our eyes; for example new online careers, jobs and opportunities and exposure to everything (dark and light) that is in existence. 

For many it has led us to want more, with a feeling of never being sated. We create ‘bucket lists’ to chase, and then move to what’s next on the list. We share our lives to show what we have successfully achieved, rather than to share a deep love for what we are engaging. 

The speed of the spread is escalating because the internet provides a huge online echo chamber making it possible for copy cat approaches. 

In a blink, when something arrives in the consciousness, it has already rippled out. It is difficult to know its origin and before long there is an influx of similar versions. So what is this about?  

It seems however that no matter who you are or what side you sit on (in government, in religion, or with causes such as climate change, vaccinations, wellbeing, wealth generation) the behaviours, words and language, have something in common… 

they use ‘red’ behaviour patterns that lead to the same feelings… worry, distrust, uncertainty, overwhelm. 

We are seeing opinions expressed over facts, accusations over discussion, bias over fairness, innuendo over exploration, tellings over collaborations, reasons to harm over reasons to care, part stories over full stories, punishing over listening, self profiting over caring, luring and cajoling over seeking understanding, with people taking sides over seeking the truth.

We are seeing that this type of battle is taking place with more people getting involved. 

And as more people are believing their way is ‘the way’, there is more and more unrest. More people are wanting to be heard and now that they have the mechanisms to do so, there is becoming a greater divide between more people, more cultures, more opinions, more topics. 

With this distraction of more disarray in our everyday lives, it seems we focus less on or look to the systems and approaches that may be creating the divide. 

What do do you notice? 

Normalisations as mirrors 

As the cycles continue, our human need for connection still remains… It is no wonder we look to social media or groups, to find a ‘tribe’ to connect with and find some sort of alignment or attachment. 

Unfortunately the non transparent use of algorithms, take advantage of our human vulnerabilities and lures us to things that may not serve us well.    

By now you may be gathering that as humans we generally lack the ability to notice our bias or addictions, so the feeling of being part of something, may override your choices. The ‘popular way’ may be followed more easily. It could be related to parenting, relating, working, eating, lifestyle.

Hence with our lack of connection and imbalance with our hearts and spirit (to follow our own path)… to feel good about ourselves, we look for more ways to ‘fit in’. It’s no wonder that when trends arrive that align with the gaps in our own needs… we follow.  

Just recently Nigel mentioned about ‘looks maxing’ by young people who are following a trend on TikTok called ‘bone smashing’. The idea is that ones looks can be improved after healing from the breaking and smashing bones. 
Ozempic is another trend where people are using a drug that was initially used to help people with diabetics, to help them lose weight and fit the picture that society wants us to resemble.  

Despite the fact that doctors, surgeons, psychologists indicate the harm and cautions involved, these trends continue. Our ability to discern the facts or use our own self discipline and responsibility seems to be waning. 

It seems that when something on these platforms resonate with our own biases, opinions, prejudices, distortions or when we have underpinning need or gap in some way… those who post or share out loud, will attract a following. It is the RAS at work. 

For example for men who believe that women are subordinates (for their own reasons), they find groups to become a part of, who share the same underlying belief… such the Tate Brothers who are controversial online influencers and former kickboxers, who are currently facing criminal charges.

Another example has been seen in the re-election of some leaders who share similar views or approaches to those who vote for them. It could be related to any topic or philosophy. It may relate to racism, misogyny, disability, intelligence, bankruptcy, rape, cheating, lying, migration, rubbishing others, sociopathy, superiority, ethics and immorality.  

In the past, we may not have been able to explain how harmful normalisations gained momentum and led to horrific crimes such as in Hitler’s reign during World War II. 
We are now watching it happening in plain site and in real time. 

So how far can we go with these normalisations driving our world?   

Disrupting the normalisations 

So how we can disrupt what is happening? 

It is from the sound of different voices questioning the validity of what is being shown, such as with the voice of Canadian prime minister Mark Carney who questioned the risks to our world wide security and prosperity. BBC

In calling out his strong resistance to the normalisations that were unfolding, he opened the door for new suggestions and alternatives that better aligned with the values and integrity of Canada. 

He initiated ways of doing things differently.

We are now seeing, the speed of these alternative responses spreading faster because of social media. In fact as I write this, we are seeing the spread of old narrative normalisations, clash with new narratives. While it is unclear what is the true situation, it is evident that there is movement.   

This brings hope that when you come back to your heart led unique self and see more clearly, you too can spread heart messages in more moments and circumstances you are in.

And when you see more, you feel more. And when you feel it strongly enough, you are more able to take on other actions and choices, in the positions and roles you hold.

This is the work for humans in the future. 

When you can get out of your mind and the delusion that has brought, and be guided by your heart, there is potential for new future ‘normals’ to come from a better understanding of what is real. It can help you to acquire the wisdom, to navigate your choices to feel safe again, and at peace in the here and now. 

And even if you may not make the move initially, as you discover more throughout this book and throughout your life… your practices will lead you to bring your actions in real time…