Nigel Stedman

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  • in reply to: Poetry Expression on line zoom #5212
    Nigel Stedman

    The poem about fear from Poetry evening 1st June 2020

    Fear can be experienced;
    watching Horror movies
    Being in the dark
    Hearing strange noises
    the unknown
    Bungy Jumping
    seeing a snake close by
    and it can be debilitating for some

    If it is about feeling frightened
    feeling your heart beat fast and loud then I have had those moments like when
    being ‘in trouble’ as a child ‘wait until your father gets home…
    not wanting to go home
    being threatened
    realising that I will die…when I was 6 and…very recently
    discovering I had 3 speeding fines…(another story)

    Sometimes it is the something inside warning of danger,
    do i listen to that within myself? (Yes)

    The fear of losing someone close can be there at times

    So what have I learnt about fear so far?
    I cannot control or suppress it
    I cannot run away from the feeling
    It is not always rational

    so Hmmm

    Franklin D Roosevelt once said ‘there is nothing to fear but Fear itself’

    When I feel fear it seems real enough fear of not experiencing real love and being with that person, fear of not feeling fulfilled from helping others before my death

    So what to do with it?
    Well I accept it
    I let it happen
    I express it
    I live it
    I support others with it…

    So maybe fear is not so bad after all
    it can be helpful as a warning, exciting even passionate

    …and the child within me still,
    jumps out from behind a tree or a bush to make someone jump… (usually someone I know)


    in reply to: Poetry Expression on line zoom #5111
    Nigel Stedman

    How did you come to be?
    Who are you?
    How are you in my life?

    Are you real?
    Or just my imaginary friend?

    What is it that makes me want to share with you?
    Wherever I am, why are you there too?

    Am I lost without you?
    No, that is not it

    Am I better with you?
    that is not it either

    Why do I wonder about you?
    Why do I care how you are feeling?
    Why are we often apart yet can be on the same wavelength?

    How do I feel your pain?
    How do I feel your joy?
    How do I sense things with you?

    Why do I want to know the deepest feelings and memories within you?
    What is this light I see around you?
    Who am I?
    How did our eventful and often tortured paths lead us here?
    Where will this all lead?

    When I thought I knew a lot, I found it was actually a grain of sand
    When I thought I could plan, I was deluded

    In reality, there are no direct answers

    Only a truth
    which explains everything and nothing

    The journey and the moments, in a breath, is all that we really have
    The heart is the link to it all
    It knows the truth

    which is:
    I love you

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