Poetry Expression on line zoom

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    Tricia La Bella

    I will remember;

    Our second poetry evening, 20/4/20.
    We created a poem together as a group, inspired by a poem about our time in isolation and the Coronavirus.
    It shows when we share what’s in our hearts, the words have power.

    I will remember…
    this loneliness
    how fragile life is
    little things matter
    variation in adaptation by governments, countries, people, organisations and communities
    my time of togetherness spending time over a wonderful cooked meal having conversations with my close loved ones – my family .
    the confusion of realities

    Thank you Kay, Gloria, Claudine, Desak, Nigel and Tricia

    Tricia La Bella


    Believe that things happen for a reason

    Everyone has their moment

    Learn to accept what is

    Imagine a better world

    Every moment matters

    have your Voice – however it sounds

    Emerge a better you


    Tricia La Bella

    Hi everyone, I hope to post our Bali poem and bring Desak’s too. Just looking at word limit on the forum.

    Tricia La Bella

    Commentary of the mind
    Over thinking
    Over analyzing
    Busy mind
    It has to be done
    Lists of lists
    Let me clear it
    Write it down
    Organized chaos
    Somehow it works

    Create busyness in my own mind
    Can’t sleep
    Full moon it must be you
    Restless with the full moon
    Is it the moon
    Letting go what do I need to let go
    Empty my mind
    Scattered thoughts
    Planning planning planning
    All chambers in my brain
    Are full
    Take me away
    Me and my camera
    What was I thinking I can’t remember
    Obviously not important
    How do I manage chaos
    How do I keep them
    Feel what is important
    Deal with it as it feels
    I can’t process it!
    Don’t force
    Play music
    Mind only working on what is in front of me right now
    Don’t try and clear it
    Let it happen
    One thing at a time
    In the moment
    Right here and now
    So much to do
    But please be with me
    Not what is next
    Calm it down
    I need my lists – do I
    Juggling time
    All happening at once
    It all exists at once
    I need to hold on to it all
    There’s so much
    I’ll look at it tomorrow
    It got done
    Get in your body and do one thing a day
    What do I feel like today
    Every now and again
    Do what you need
    What would happen if…
    I let go of my list
    And trust that I will get it done – in the time it is arrives
    Know yourself
    I’m exhausted
    Right now really

    Tricia La Bella

    My Why of Bali In A Jar poetry

    I was here for a while

    In Exile

    Feeling all alone…

    And missing home

    Something so authentic

    Something so exotic

    Bali In A Jar

    I know it will go far

    Bridging the Bali connection

    It requires some perfection

    Even becomes the talk in every bar

    Everywhere like a star!

    Tricia La Bella

    Letting go.

    Fear is unfrozen fun
    If you don’t let go you can’t have fun
    Let go of the past
    Fear about the future
    Out side your comfort zone
    Process the past
    Step into the new day
    Being in the moment
    What is letting go
    I don’t know
    Being brave to move forward
    To something
    Find the way
    The way to let go
    If We can’t forgive ourselves
    We Hold on to relive events.
    How do you forgive
    Opening new doors
    Uncertainty of what is ahead
    Letting go
    Know your self
    Have fun
    Dress up because I can

    Waking up
    Inner child
    Where is it
    Feel it
    Bring back the music

    What is letting

    Why we do worry future
    Always planning

    I have little control over anything

    I have no fear of dying
    I am willing to adjust to anything

    Going with the flow
    I went from zero to hero
    Plan not to plan

    Holding onto clutter
    Accepting things you can’t change
    And affecting things you can
    Be the best in every moment

    Is this wisdom
    Just be
    what you can be

    My mantra let go
    Teacher please help me see

    We need support
    Coaches or your best friend
    Perhaps a stranger
    Just a conversation
    I love my grand father

    I am conscious now I can let go

    Am I clinging
    Why am I holding on ?

    Ask the question
    Is this paying the rent?
    So let it go

    In gratitude
    I can let go of the bad

    I need to do this myself
    Such a hard learn

    Wasn’t it you?
    I now realise it can only be me

    Let go I can
    And Allow other things in

    If the wall is up
    I can’t be open

    There’s power in this letting

    I think it would be good trust

    Nigel Stedman

    How did you come to be?
    Who are you?
    How are you in my life?

    Are you real?
    Or just my imaginary friend?

    What is it that makes me want to share with you?
    Wherever I am, why are you there too?

    Am I lost without you?
    No, that is not it

    Am I better with you?
    that is not it either

    Why do I wonder about you?
    Why do I care how you are feeling?
    Why are we often apart yet can be on the same wavelength?

    How do I feel your pain?
    How do I feel your joy?
    How do I sense things with you?

    Why do I want to know the deepest feelings and memories within you?
    What is this light I see around you?
    Who am I?
    How did our eventful and often tortured paths lead us here?
    Where will this all lead?

    When I thought I knew a lot, I found it was actually a grain of sand
    When I thought I could plan, I was deluded

    In reality, there are no direct answers

    Only a truth
    which explains everything and nothing

    The journey and the moments, in a breath, is all that we really have
    The heart is the link to it all
    It knows the truth

    which is:
    I love you

    Tricia La Bella

    May 25th 2020 Expressions by the group

    Love is painful
    Secret love ?
    Growing up with love
    Brings us love
    Is that love?
    We use love to mean so many things
    It often lessens the meaning of love
    We over use the word
    We under use the word

    How do we say what we mean
    Hi love …
    Do not call me love

    Do I trust the word love?
    A love that loves what is

    Love is self care
    Love starts with yourself
    Self taught me compassion

    Love is word
    Words are easy
    Love is feeling
    Feeling what ?
    Love is nature
    The feeling it brings
    The senses are coming together

    Love hurts
    Love comes with an open heart
    The heart is vulnerable
    Close your heart so you don’t hurt
    But then I’m sad
    If I open my heart love can be felt

    How can I open my heart
    The lessons
    Come to myself first
    Can I open my heart

    It’s so hard to open up
    We learn to close our heart

    I don’t want to feel
    Keep breaking your heart until it opens

    The hurt is so great with pain I can not bear it

    Then I miss out if I close off my heart

    To love is to have pain

    Sisterly love
    But I may not like it

    There’s different kinds of love

    Love things
    Love passions
    When passion is there there is love

    Express it
    show feel it
    Search it
    Say it
    Understand it

    Connect with it

    We die
    love dies

    Is Love eternal?
    Love is beautiful

    I used to love
    And now i don’t
    Was it love?

    What is this thing called love?

    So what word instead?

    We say love
    But is it?

    Love changes
    You can love in a different way
    Soul mate unconditional

    Culture changes things
    A love, a strong pull towards

    I did love but don’t now?

    feelings never die
    Their smell
    Their memories
    Stay with us forever

    Tricia La Bella

    Monday 1st June 2020 Fear

    Not getting it right
    What will they think?
    My fear
    Dying with a song unsung

    I say no
    It takes me a while
    I go round and round
    I eventually settle

    My fear from needing to be perfect

    Impact of needing to be perfect as a child

    Damn fears I know why

    What if we don’t have labels

    Unlabel how powerful that way

    through just expressing just as it is for us

    in this moment that was captured

    Chillies and all

    Be yourself and be free
    Wait til your father gets home

    Warning of danger


    I can not control it

    Of not being fulfilled

    What do I do

    I let it be
    It is a part of life

    Feel it

    There’s beyond fear

    Fear of boredom

    I need to keep moving

    Fear of being in the same spot
    Fear of not being all of who I am

    Fear of not living

    Fear of losing you

    Are you there Claudine?

    I fear being successful

    What will it being if I succeed

    The unknown

    Fear of unsustainable

    No chilies now what

    Every thing is out of my control

    In fear – we add to the story

    Is fear the same as afraid

    Is fear the same as worry

    Fear of letting people down

    We live with fear
    Because we fear losing it

    When I stopped worrying about losing

    I trusted…

    I just do what I do

    Every time I build something

    it crumbles…

    So many variables out of our control

    There’s a lot of strain in controlling

    NZ free of covid19

    Then comes an earthquake

    So what fear do I fear?

    I fear for our world
    For my kids

    My kids kids

    What will be there for them ?

    The world is changing

    I care for my family
    I care for the animals
    I care for our environment

    How are they going to live?

    I fear for what is ahead for them

    What is the world going to be ?

    Can our fear drive us ?

    Let fear help us be active

    Transform the fear and emotions to move and create

    Feel the fear

    The back of my neck

    I hold fear in my body

    What do i want?

    I feel heat in my body

    My fear comes with anger

    My emotions come together

    My fear has a character

    It keeps things light

    It gives me a way to calm

    Fear takes my breath away

    I might give it a name

    Don’t let fear define me

    My fears hang around but I don’t beat myself up for about it

    Go for it – to overcome the fear

    We have nothing to fear but fear itself

    Nigel Stedman

    The poem about fear from Poetry evening 1st June 2020

    Fear can be experienced;
    watching Horror movies
    Being in the dark
    Hearing strange noises
    the unknown
    Bungy Jumping
    seeing a snake close by
    and it can be debilitating for some

    If it is about feeling frightened
    feeling your heart beat fast and loud then I have had those moments like when
    being ‘in trouble’ as a child ‘wait until your father gets home…
    not wanting to go home
    being threatened
    realising that I will die…when I was 6 and…very recently
    discovering I had 3 speeding fines…(another story)

    Sometimes it is the something inside warning of danger,
    do i listen to that within myself? (Yes)

    The fear of losing someone close can be there at times

    So what have I learnt about fear so far?
    I cannot control or suppress it
    I cannot run away from the feeling
    It is not always rational

    so Hmmm

    Franklin D Roosevelt once said ‘there is nothing to fear but Fear itself’

    When I feel fear it seems real enough fear of not experiencing real love and being with that person, fear of not feeling fulfilled from helping others before my death

    So what to do with it?
    Well I accept it
    I let it happen
    I express it
    I live it
    I support others with it…

    So maybe fear is not so bad after all
    it can be helpful as a warning, exciting even passionate

    …and the child within me still,
    jumps out from behind a tree or a bush to make someone jump… (usually someone I know)


    Tricia La Bella

    June 8, 2020 Dreams (expressed by the group)

    What do dreams mean?

    What are they about?

    What is a dream state?
    Like pethidine

    You are floating
    Everyone is in the distance

    It takes me back
    They just can’t you see

    Others can’t see me
    And yet I feel it’s real

    A dream – while you sleep

    I dream to aspire

    A dream like state

    A daydream

    It was as if she had been lifted and transported to a green and leafy walkway, where the only sound was water tricking in the rice fields and the occasional birdcall.

    Take me away
    To lose focus

    Take me away

    Let me wonder in my mind

    I felt sad. Let the dream take me to happiness.

    The dream is in a bubble.

    A mind bubble.

    A meditation.

    A mindless state.

    Wandering in your mind

    Dream about the future is wondering

    My dreams

    Every night

    I have 3 each night

    What are they about?
    Why do I dream of you?

    The witch doctor helps sort out dreams.

    There’s no control in my dreams!

    Even if I want to, I can’t make things happen.

    I can’t remember my dreams

    Some dreams I don’t want to remember

    My dream in this life
    Is to touch 10,000 lives

    I did this morning touch someone – she made banana fritters and her family loved them.

    I dream for a world of kindness.
    A better world.

    You’re living the dream…

    A way of living.

    Bringing joy to people.

    I enjoy the joy I see.

    That’s my sisters name you know – Joy!

    Now give me some pethidine…

    When you’re in your dream you have no control

    You’re somewhere else

    You ponder

    You sit in your garden

    And remember something nice from the past and let your mind go there

    Do you consciously daydream?

    I’m in my own state.

    I feel a pull that leads me to a trance, a freeze, a relief.

    Through the lens
    It’s like a dream
    Deep into the succulent
    A personal message arrives

    Soaked in immersion

    Photography leads me in…

    Dare to dream

    Dream big

    Keep dreaming

    Live the dream

    I dreamed a dream

    Tricia La Bella

    Poetry 22nd June 2020


    I can’t remember jokes

    Why do we laugh when things aren’t funny?

    A sick sense of humour?

    Dressing up makes me laugh

    So why do we laugh

    Sometimes it’s better to laugh than to cry

    I dressed up through cancer

    My scar had a smiling face and it helped me laugh

    Laughter helps me cope

    Best thing is to laugh it off

    Laughter is a relief

    Sometimes it’s a nervous response

    I’d rather laugh

    It gives a release

    It gives me time to think through things

    To laugh is to relax

    To release emotions

    Even inappropriately sometimes

    Sometimes it strikes me as funny when it’s not the time

    It can lighten me

    I’m comfotrtable at laughing at myself

    What about if you’re not funny

    I don’t laugh that much

    Yoga laughter – is it real

    Smokey and the Bandit made me laugh

    Movies make me laugh

    I like to laugh with someone

    Laughter is contagious


    Laughter is the best medicine

    Laugh at
    Laugh with
    Laugh to

    We can we laugh in a group to stimulate each other to release –

    I don’t like that

    Laughter is a release of sound

    Natural laughter

    Talk sex that makes me laugh

    It’s Either sex or laughter

    Laugh at what you don’t have

    Laughter is triggered by humour

    Laughter is therapy

    Being more open brings me more joy

    And Then I laugh more

    Smile and your voice changes

    Fake it til you make it

    Can we laugh too much

    Trust brings laughter

    Nervous laughter

    Just because you laugh doesn’t mean you’re ok

    Laughter can mask other things

    Can we see through to someone’s pain

    That’s uncomfortable

    There’s tone in laughter

    Doesn’t ring true or add up – uncomfortable

    You can feel it

    Even darkness

    Laughter can help put others at ease

    If it’s not sincere it feels uncomfortable

    Laughter for the sake of following others?


    Robyn Williams a sad person who can make people laugh

    You can tell your story through comedy

    Even a dark story

    Humour a bandaid

    I wish I was funny

    When you don’t try – that’s funny

    Sometimes trying to be funny is not funny

    That’s funny

    Exaggeration makes it funny



    Art – it’s an art

    Funny at someone’s expense – is that funny?

    I laugh when someone doesn’t think they’re funny

    Gloias funnier than Tricia

    Or when there’s an accident

    Like walking into a lamp post

    The cackle laugh

    That’s funny

    Is it politically correct to laugh in situations?

    You could really be misunderstood with laughter…

    Tricia La Bella

    There’s no time for boredom

    When you can’t be with yourself

    Boredom is a lived experience

    How does it feel

    Having nothing to do?

    Is that boredom

    You can be bored to death

    Disinterest is that boredom

    Find the way to be interested

    When you feel boredom do something crazy

    Kids say they’re bored
    They don’t like it

    Bored or difficult

    Express as bored

    What does it feel like to be bored

    Is it a state?

    When there’s no interest?

    What leads someone to say it’s boring…

    When it feels dull
    Non stimulating
    Tone of voice – monotone

    Not connected to it

    What happens in your body when it’s boring

    Shutting down
    Shutting off

    Low energy

    I yawn

    I like being bored
    I can shut off

    Boredom gives permission to shut off

    When there’s disinterest
    I go some where else

    I let my imagination wonder

    Into my own thoughts
    I learnt to Entertain myself

    If I’m bored I find something else to do

    Sometimes you can sit in your body for a while until you realise and choose to move

    Let boredom be
    Let them be
    Find their way free

    Boredom is state

    The weather keeps us in
    Coronavirus keeps us in
    Can bring boredom

    Attention span

    Sit in boredom to think of your own way to something

    This is boring talking about boredom

    A lull in activity

    Boredom or silence

    Need to fill the gap
    Break the silence

    Rather conversation

    Boredom when your disappointed when plans don’t turn out

    Boredom or disappointed

    Boredom or meditative

    Boredom or unable to find something

    Are we losing our imagination – a form of intelligence

    I play games that breaks the boredom

    Boredom through the plains

    Boredom motivator towards excitement and doing new things

    The positive of boredom

    Where do you go?

    Go for a walk

    Meditation choose to find space

    Boredom may feel like it’s not your own choice – imposed

    It has no meaning to me

    No interest

    Have to not want to

    Can you do boredom

    The boredom spectrum

    How do you define boredom

    Unpleasant leads to boredom

    Too much of anything

    How much of activity before

    You can’t get bored painting walls – mediating / hallucinating

    It’s ok to be bored

    Boredom is lack of choice

    Get away from boredom

    It’s a yin and yang

    Boredom happiness
    Boredom desire
    Boredom energy
    Boredom over stimulation

    Thanks Lesly for your joke to end – broke the boredom

    Tricia La Bella

    13th July

    Why should it matter?
    Whether you are or not.
    So what is it?

    “Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” -Maya Angelou

    Is success about achieving something?

    Success, it’s more an experience of success

    I don’t like it when people say I’m successful

    Sometimes that comment doesn’t feel kind or genuine

    It’s an inner feeling

    Success is not absolute

    Society has its own sense of success

    Society success is loud

    There’s no pass or fail

    Success is relative to where I’ve come from

    Celebrate for your own sense of success

    Success is progress


    How lovely seeing progress – that’s to celebrate

    Not about the best

    Not comparing

    You can’t compare with some-one else

    Define what success is before you start the game!

    Don’t play dirty to win, that’s not winning

    Is that winning or bullying.

    When is success not winning?

    What does success feel like?

    Success for me is going through the Heysen tunnel

    I did it!

    Success is overcoming fear, anxiety.

    Success is living

    Success is doing what you love – having fun

    Winning a position,

    It’s not about the position

    That’s about accolades

    It’s about did you make a difference?

    It’s like making Money, and still feeling empty

    We didn’t celebrate success when we were young,

    because success was not valued.

    Some Parents push their kids to be successful

    So they feel successful

    So they feel good

    The parents can’t, so they want their kids to do it

    What pressure

    That’s awful

    Success is feeling good about what you did.

    If I win and others lose, how does that winning feel?

    Success is knowing I’ve made a difference.

    Progress rather than success.

    There’s not an end

    The journey is what’s important

    We can’t measure the success by someone else’s success

    Some want to win

    But what does that mean?

    There’s no such thing as success

    Success – A judgement of feeling

    A feeling

    The stress of success

    Is there another word other than success?

    Success is growth

    The small things

    Success is influenced by those around you

    Success to me is happiness,

    it’s not about money or possessions, it’s about life and relationships.

    Success is progress and fulfillment

    No expectation

    Tricia La Bella

    Thanks to the group, this is just as it unfolded… looking back helps you realise how rich the conversation and formation of the expression

    Giving is receiving
    Palms up is giving
    Palms down is grounding

    Receiving is an experience
    An experience is when the heart is open

    Receiving is when you give when your heart is open

    Intention to give

    Receiving from the universe


    When the intention is there, you can receive

    With your heart

    The energy comes back to you when you give positively

    Energy is what you put out – the vibration

    I’m embarrassed to receive – I ‘m used to giving

    Receiving can feel uncomfortable because you may not be used it

    Why is it so hard to receive?

    Perhaps our culture – to give and not receive

    When we accept that we have done well – do we believe that we are worthy
    Often we don’t feel that we are worthy

    Or perhaps we think there is a need to give back

    It’s OK to receive

    Perhaps it’s about sincerity

    or is it that it doesn’t feel real or believable

    Can you feel the difference between receiving with sincerity

    How do I trust so I can receive

    Can I receive graciously – let the person giving feel good about giving

    So can I learn to receive graciously

    So maybe that is a practice to accept and receive

    How can I trust when I am suspicious?

    So how can I let go a little and receive – perhaps the help I need

    Even when we truly need help…

    We may be pushing others away.

    Can’t receive when you can’t let go of what is stopping you

    Can’t because you want to have full control

    The down side of not receiving graciously you can push people away

    So it is a balance

    So how can you receive a compliment graciously

    Perhaps a thank you

    Receive and accept and say thank you

    Perhaps it tells you something about the other person feels about you

    You learn about their perspectives on you

    When you are open to receive – you are more likely to see more of what is available

    is this about Karma –

    Out of everything we receive – even the bad,

    While at first they are received – they feel as pain

    After time they are seen as lessons

    The pain eventually heals – the lesson of forgiveness can unfold

    When you trust people first – you can go through life open,

    The conscious choice to trust – may bring pain – however there is much to gain.

    Without trust – your world can close up

    Trust is a short cut to life

    When something good comes through the door, open the door

    So let go and let it happen…
    Open your heart to receive,

    thank you

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